Well, I am sad to post today. Josh has begun declining. He is getting confused now and very tired and the swelling from the steroids is extreme. I want to explain some things. We are still doing activities and he is still having fun but there are some things I want to say. He is losing his affect. That means that he doesn't always smile or respond appropriately and it is hard to tell if he is enjoying the activity but I promise he is. A good example is Ragnar. Our friends ran a 200 mile relay race and dedicated it to Josh. We met them at the finish line and when they came in he got to cross the finish line with them. He loved it but didn't respond much. But when we helped him stand and cross the finish line his smile was wide and my eyes were filled with tears. It was a good day and a special time for him. He is struggling now to focus on things but still has goals and we are just moving forward day by day. He doesn't get up much before 11am but the best time to visit is before 3, that is when he is the most alert. Also, small groups are best now he can't handle too much at once.
We are making each day count and want you to know how much you all mean to him and us. Ted asked me how much longer Josh had and I told him we don't know but think it is getting short. I feel such peace and we are just praying now that he doesn't suffer and can be happy. We want to let you know and ask for you to pray for us to have strength and be strong enough to do what we need to. Josh said he is a little afraid of what is coming and I told him it was like a little one at the pool. Dad is standing in the water and telling them to jump but they are scared to do it. When they finally jump it is wonderful and they beg to do it again. I told him not to be afraid to jump and his Heavenly Father would catch him. He fell asleep after that and I think it helped. I am grateful to find the words when I need them and know that we are being guided everyday. This road is long and hard but I am so grateful we don't walk it alone.
Ruth, I have to say how inspired I am every day I read what u post. You have such a beautiful way of expressing what u feel and all that is happening that amazes me and strengthens my testimony. I pray to ever be able to handle even the smallest trial like u do. I love u.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry to hear this, you and your family are truly inspirational. Sending my thoughts and love
ReplyDelete-Brittany
Ruth you are the perfect parent for your children. You have the wisdom patience and love to handle this unique situation. How blessed your children are to have you and Gordon as their guide.
ReplyDeleteRuth, your faith is such a strength to me. Josh probably wouldn't wven remember me but the short amount of time I spent in your home in Omaha had a huge effect on me. You are great parents, such great parents that you can handle this kind of thing with such grace and humility and hope. You are in our prayers. Much love.
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